We have heard it many times before, our words have power.  We see it in the world of advertising and politics, but do we really consider our words when we are in our personal leadership roles?  As a Boss we must remain aware of the words we use and how they impact our self image and perception by others.  Think about how often you say the following phrases:


  • “I DON’T KNOW”

This isn’t to suggest you are supposed to know everything about everything, however when your initial response to someone seeking your input is “I don’t know”- it shows a sign of inadequacy.  Yup- I know that no one is perfect or always prepared, but in moments when people are coming to you for solutions, you don’t want your first response to be “I don’t know” because that disqualifies you for being a resource.  You must be intentional on the way you answer the question.  Alternative responses can include-” You know who’s really great at that? Rachel, I will give you her info”.  This allows you to support your position as a Boss and provide direction for the best information source if that is not your area of leadership.  You always want to speak from a place of strength, and confidence- saying “I don’t know” does not reflect those character traits.

  • “I CAN’T”

This is a classic and it is more of an internal declaration you want to avoid, as opposed to how you are perceived by others.  One thing that helps you stand out in a crowd is confidence, it is one of those qualities that will help you rise to the top.  When you believe in yourself, others will believe in you as well.  When you say, “I can’t”, that’s you saying to yourself that you don’t believe in yourself.  Saying “I can’t “is declaring that it is impossible for you to “be”. This is a lie we tell ourselves at times when we feel fear and doubt in our abilities.  The road to success is different for each if us, however possibility lives in our belief.  If you believe your can- you can.  It’s just that simple.  It takes work, but it is possible. Some things require more work than others, yet it is all possible.  So, as a Boss, recognize the moments when we doubt ourselves by saying “I can’t”, use that moment to ask yourself “what will it take to make this possible?’  A simple shift in words brings life and intentions to a seemingly impossible situation.

  • “I’LL TRY”

When you are asked to commit to an event or task, we must speak with integrity and clarity.  Saying “I’ll try” is a cop out- because it really means no.  We say I’ll try to hide from the responsibility of disappointing others or yourself when you do not perform as expected.  Try is not a word that should be in the vocabulary of a Boss- you must be clear, and you must bring clarity to those that you are leading.  Using words such as “I’ll try”, “I can’t”, or “I don’t know” – it’s not a reflection of strength, empowerment, or confidence.  This prevents people from seeing your clearly as a leader.

  • “I FAILED’

I must give the disclaimer that I believe that there is only one path to true failure– To stop putting forth effort towards a goal.  To me, the only way to fail is to stop working towards success.  This is a big topic, (more than I can cover in this post) but I will give a concise explanation based on my theory of failure.

When situations do not produce the expected results, it is not a failure of the person, it is the result of using an ineffective strategy.  It took Thomas Edison, hundreds of attempts before getting the lightbulb to work.  He consistently changes his strategy until he reached a functioning product.  That’s what build success, the ability to shift strategy and continue your road to achievement.  Oprah had to change her strategy numerous times before her television network found success.  The bottom line is a Boss never fails- strategies fail, Bosses adjust.


  • “I QUIT”

A Boss doesn’t quit.  Quitting is an immature solution to a challenge. Because it’ an emotional decision.  When you are in a position of leadership, you don’t want to make decisions based upon emotion.  Making permanent decisions based on temporary feelings is defiantly not a BOSS MOVE. It’s not to say you do not have these feelings of frustration and other emotions, however, as a BOSS you do not let those emotions lead you- we are winners and winners never quit.  So, when you are facing a challenge and massive emotions arise, take a break.  The difference between quitting and taking a break is all in the purpose.  Taking a break is just that, taking an emotional break, clearing your head and coming back to the issue from a new perspective.  When a Boss decided that a situation is no longer worth the effort, that is an intellectual decision, not an emotional tantrum.  There will be times when the effort is not worth the results- this is a decision based on a full analysis of the situation, emotions are not the leading factor.  A Boss does not quit, a Boss withdrawals additional investment of her resources.

As a Boss, our role is to lead, bring clarity and confidence into situations.  The words we use can build strong companies, organizations, and communities.  Choose your words wisely, speak with integrity and dignity for yourself and those who follow you- SPEAK LIKE A BOSS.


For more interaction, live coaching and more- join the Dreambuilders Facebook Group

Boss Life: What a Friday

Today was one of those days when life puts you to the test.  My body was not adjusting well to all the temperature changes, my team had a long busy week, and an enemy has been working overtime to derail my peace.  Moments like this can either make or break you.  Emotions are flying high, energy is running low and the easiest solution seems to be- to just give up.  However, quitting is not an option, not for me.  Not for a Boss.  I am a winner and winners never quit.

I had to take a deep breath and remind myself of all the great and wonderful advice I give everyone else in moments like this- “just breathe and focus on what you can control in this moment.”  I began by reminding myself of who I am- reciting a list of affirmations I reserve for challenging moments: ” I am ambitious. I am resilient. I am resourceful …..” There are currently 58 affirmations on my list.  Doing this helped me refocus my mind, reduce emotions and find clarity I needed for the task at hand.  My team is looking at me for guidance, they have hit a wall on their ability to address the issue and it was time for me to #bossup.

Once I got my mind right, I was able to coach the team thru the strategy needed to resolve the issue and ease their concerns as well.  I made some calls to set the plan in motion, delegated a few tasks to the team in preparation of the next steps in the plan.  Emotions returned to normal, and we did what we do best- we win! Working together we implemented the plan and walked away with a higher level of confidence in each other and our mission.  There is nothing like a challenge to bring out the best in you.  Boss Life isn’t always about the cute posts you see on social media, it’s work- real work.  The rewards are great, but they come after great investments are made.  Don’t let the glitter fool you, it is created from a recipe of blood, sweat, and tears.

May you always remember your purpose and let destiny be your guide.


Share this post with the Boss Lady in your network, lets continue to support and encourage one another.  For more interaction, live business coaching, and more, join our Facebook group- Dreambuilders of Boss Moves International